So…here it is!
You can now PRE-ORDER TEMPTED on AMAZON in EBOOK format. You can find the link at the bottom of this post or visit my home page :D The paperback form will be released on Christmas Day, which is the official release date!
Until then though, I'll leave you with another present...the first chapter of Tempted.
Don't say I don't love you ;)
CHAPTER 1
“A warrior of death I will always be and with thy will I set thee free”.
As I fall through endless darkness, twisting and turning towards some unknown outcome, this same phrase re-plays over and over again in my mind. It grows louder with each tumble.
“A warrior of death I will always be and with thy will I set thee free”.
“A warrior of death I will always be and with thy will I set thee free”.
“A warrior of death I will always be and with thy will I set thee free”.
I recall the person behind the voice, who dared to utter such powerful and fateful words. Their face flashes across my mind.
Adam.
My heart sings at the thought of his name.
Adam.
The more I say his name, the more my brain is flooded by memories.
Memories.
Oh, how I love that word.
That word means anything and everything to me, now that I have a taste of what it is like to remember.
A memory is like a light in a world of darkness.
I might write that on my headstone one day, if I ever feel the need to get one that is.
No.
I’ll start again.
I might write that on my headstone one day, if I ever get one.
You see, I’m dead. At least I think I am. The environment I’m currently surrounded by highlights this delightful thought, in all its macabre glory. To add a hefty kick to my circumstances, I don’t think I’m dead in the usual sense, or what people define as the “usual sense”. For some people, death by hose-pineapple combination could be considered normal, not that I want to know how or why someone died that way. On top of it being weird, it’s their business, not mine. Anyway, going back to me, which is my favourite topic after all, further complications that surround my situation include the understanding that I don’t know where I am.
A glint of a dagger.
A flash of colours.
Searing pain.
The cycle begins again. Another memory. Another nightmare. The memory is of my death – the moment when I became damned, trapped between worlds and condemned to walk the earth, eternally alone. That was the moment that kickstarted all this insane drama. That was the moment that defined me, who I thought I was and who I was destined to become. Then, I met Adam.
Adam.
I smile again.
Adam.
He changed everything.
Another thought pops into my overactive and curious mind. On the topic of death (which really is such a wonderful one and one I’m sure you’re only too happy to be reading about, although I’m sure you have worked out by now that the entirety of my tale centers around such a notion) usually when you die, you have a body.
Do I have a body?
I haven’t got a scooby.
Ha ha, scooby. That’s funny.
Sorry.
Perhaps the form I am in now, whatever it is, is my body?
That is possible.
Equally well, it could be a load of crap.
The trouble is, if I don’t have a physical body and instead, it is more of a spiritual one, my plan to have the headstone I mentioned earlier would be void. Damn. Just my hellish luck to be stuck in this position. This leads me onto the final point – one that rears its annoying head. If I don’t have a headstone, could I have a cremation? Not really.
This is what I eventually decide after what feels like an eternity.
Back when I was damned, I saw plenty of cremations for sure. One of the most interesting ones involved a family who spent the whole time drinking and playing poker on top of the coffin, before it was engulfed by flames. Who am I to judge? They certainly celebrated the life of their loved one in their own way. Isn’t that what death is all about? Celebrating the life of the people or persons you’ve lost? Anyhow, back to my original point. I couldn’t have a cremation because they burn the bodies during that time and well, we’ve already touched upon the issues surrounding this notion. The same can be said for a burial, as you would need a real body for a proper burial. I know it doesn’t always happen, but they do say that everything is eaten by the earth in the end and, if there is no body to be eaten, then the earth and me wouldn’t be very happy. Also, that thought is just creepy and disturbing as hell. Being eaten by worms and other bugs. I shudder.
Ah heck.
All this philosophical talk is hurting my brain, in addition to being seriously complex.
Why do I have to complicate things?
It wouldn’t be me if I didn’t.
As I was saying, before I took a lengthy, theoretical detour, I have one memory – my name. Now, as a result of all that has happened in my eventful life, I have many. They return with every passing second. Each memory hits me like an ocean swirl, just like my rhythmic movements through this endless tunnel of blackness. They carry me upwards, soaring high on a whirling current, before I twirl back downwards, only to repeat again. I recall the moment when Adam first saw me – the moment the world I knew had been ripped apart. I remember the pang of shock, fear and excitement that had flooded my veins, as I gazed into his eyes. He’d been a real jerk during that first conversation – one I’d been only too tempted to silence. I recall the look of revulsion that hadn’t really left his features for a long time, even after we had established our mutual agreement. It had been there, every time his eyes had pierced my soul. It had been there every time he had looked at me and then at Grace.
Grace.
I wonder what has become of her.
As far as I can re-call, Adam had gone on a date with her. I was itching to know how it had gone. Not what she had expected I bet, from the way Adam had shown up to save me. Perhaps I would see her again, at some point?
I could only hope.
The things I have planned for her.
I chuckle.
Adam’s features flash for the umpteenth time in my mind, drawing me back. They had often haunted my thoughts and dreams during the time we had gotten to know one another. The disgust he had once felt towards had been like a shadow. It had often dipped a toe in dangerous waters – waters that had threatened to suck him under and never let him go. I don’t know the exact defining moment that had highlighted the change in his feelings towards me – and mine to be fair. Maybe there had been no defining moment. It certainly wasn’t any of that instant love at first sight nonsense.
I gag.
Yes, there had been attraction, of that I was certain. Physically, Adam’s eyes were one of his most compelling features. I had noted those the moment we had clocked one another. He also had other compelling features, but I think I should leave those to your imagination. As for the personality front, he had SUCKED. Adam had had the whole character of a deranged ape. He had been an idiot - ill-tempered, stubborn and arrogant. He still was, at times. In that respect, I viewed the development in our relationship as being a gradual thing. The more we had spent time in each other’s company, the more he had seen the real me and not the scars that lined my body. He had become accustomed to my sarcastic awesomeness and, as this all had taken place, the more I had seen his true self. I’d seen the kind, loyal and fiercely protective man behind the disgust – the man that had made me laugh and feel as if I could be me – just…me.
Grace had also played a spectacular role. She had often run her fingers all over his body and through his hair, teasing me – taunting me with thoughts I knew would never be acted upon. Perhaps it was longing for something I thought I couldn’t have? Perhaps it was the knowledge that I was no longer alone – that I had, for some unknown reason at first, found someone I could converse and, on occasion, enjoyed laughing with? I recalled the time he had moaned my name whilst sleeping. My intrigue had one hundred percent been increased, as had my heart rate. I still wondered now what he had been thinking – what he had been feeling…
Shivers of pleasure run down my spine. Easy tiger. I could only speculate. For Adam, my guess was that his feelings for me were truly explored when he had defended Jason, not long after Jen had turned her back on the light and her friends when she had dated Robbie. Jen. A pang of fear darted through my heart. Oh boy. What had become of her? She had committed suicide under the control of that demon. The demon – Lilith – appeared before my mind’s eye in all her unnatural beauty. She stood, beautiful, proud and full of all the malice at everything that wandered this place, wherever I was and the Earth. Lilith had known me. She had murdered me which, in turn, had caused me to become damned. I shivered, before rage flowed through my veins. If I ever saw Lilith again, I would make her pay. I would make her pay so much that she’d wish she’d never entered this cruel world, let alone hunted me.
Adam returned, surrounded by the dim lighting of the cell he had been held in not long after the fight. He had looked so broken and bruised during that time and yet, in those precious few moments, he’d been very much alive – more alive than I had ever seen him before. A strange fire had burned in his eyes. The things he had said…the implications he had made. My heart flutters. All in all, the whole situation had been a slow, torturous process. That much is true. I had often told myself a thousand times over that I was better alone – that I should never have let him in – let him see the most vulnerable parts of me. That was my weakness, no matter how hard I tried to be strong.
That would always be my weakness.
That would always be my downfall.
That and pride, stupidity and stubbornness.
Knowing what I did now, I’d never give up those memories – not for all the wealth, power or knowledge in the world. Adam had seen me and he had…loved me for it, as crazy as that sounded.
Can you really fall in love with someone in the space of a few weeks and, more importantly, is he really the one for you? This thought teases me, clinging to my being like a weight. You know as well as I do that there are others out there – others who, as much as it seems insane, could care for you in the way Adam has grown to care. All you need to do is throw in a line and see what, or should I say who, takes a bite of that hook. Then, you will know where you stand.
I shudder. A small part of my heart grows cold with a growing fear. As much as I fight it, I can’t help but allow a little of myself to surrender to this statement.
Stop this thinking! Another part of my brain snarls. Remember how lucky you are to have found Adam, who loves you for who you are, irrespective of what you look like.
And yet, the owner of the previous thought returns, more determined than ever to get me to accept this line of thinking. You forget that people change. So do emotions. You would be a fool to think otherwise. After all, Adam and you have changed so much throughout the time you have been together. Thoughts and feelings are as fluid as the sea, as are actions. You know that, deep down. You can’t control any of those elements any less than Adam can, especially now that you had been thrown apart. The next time you meet, for I’m sure you’ll see him again, you could be changed individuals and, because of that fact, you might feel differently.
I shiver again, trying to bar such traitorous thoughts from my mind. I don’t know what is right or what voice to listen to. The only thing that could give me such answers is time, and I’m not exactly able to manipulate that. All I can do is hold onto how I feel now and embrace the hope that warms my heart. Suddenly, Adam’s features are gone. Instead, my senses are focused on the sound of almighty tearing. I cry out, covering my ears with my hands. It’s as if some important person is unhappy with the way my surroundings are designed and has decided to redecorate. I cry out again as the memory of something hard and cold is abruptly thrusted deep within the organ I treasure the most – my heart.
It rips through every fiber that holds this vital structure in place, like an icy steel blade.
The item in question is Adam’s scythe. It’s electric blue and burns fiercely as it follows through with its intended purpose. My eyes travel upward. Golden light is everywhere. It’s taken over Adam’s hair, which spits and crackles, as a thousand flames dance above his head and are mirrored by his incredible eyes. To an outsider, such a situation would appear more than fantastical. To those who know our story, such a change not only brought us together, but bound us too.
This is because he’s a reaper. A voice deep within my soul reminds me. More specifically, he’s your reaper. This is what reapers look like. This is what reapers do.
OK.
Not all reapers look like Adam.
Adam’s father doesn’t.
For the briefest moments in time, I struggle to remember his name. It hits me almost as hard as the remembrance of Adam’s confession.
Leon.
That was it.
He hadn’t liked me.
I’d gotten that sense the second time we had met.
It was as if he sensed something about me, something that I still didn’t know about, which firmly changed his opinion of what I was and who I was as a person.
In that respect, I hadn’t been sold on him either. It was he who currently stands between Adam and I being together.
I will not allow this to happen.
As anger floods my veins, I scream as my back rips open even more, as something tries to burst through the flesh in a desperate bid for freedom. Gaping slits have formed in this part of my body, just under my shoulder blades. In a flurry of blinding pain and feathers, I glance behind me as I twist and turn. I am unable to stop the gasp that is omitted from my throat. I try to process what has now fully formed from two, well-defined slits in my back. I now am the confused and somewhat terrified owner of a pair of shimmering black wings, which are now fully fledged. My face contorts, as it blurs between my current appearance and my other form, almost like a broken video player. As I spin, I feel their powerful beats, as they try to successfully steady my descent.
Descent to where? The voice returns.
I have no idea.
As if hearing my inner thoughts and turmoil, the darkness is obliterated by a ray of light, before glittering gold, red and orange sparkles fall and flutter around me like gleaming fireflies. Such beauty only seems to emphasise the rich auburn of my hair, which tangles around my neck, face and body. Upside down, I reach out and watch the sparkles fall through my pale finger tips. They are stunning and are reflected in my wide eyes. No sooner have I been treated to this stunning display, the sparkles start to hum, before vibrating. They begin to stick together like magnets. Beneath me, the sparkles form an enormous hoop that rotates in the form of an ever-continuous circle. Such a shape reflects my life as it currently stands – a life with no clear outcome. The circle spins faster and faster, until the sparkles have become a blur. I know something is about to happen – something monumental.
“Don’t let go of me.” I hear myself say to Adam, as I recall our last precious few moments together on Earth.
“Never.” Adam tells me.
I hold onto Adam’s response. The image of his mouth on mine flickers before my eyes, like a scene from a movie that is stuck on pause. I hold onto the feel and taste of his lips with every molecule.
I’m consumed by the fiery circle.
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